so lately i've been really convicted that i need to be guarded against losing sight of what i'm really doing here. it's easy to forget the core of why i can even love others, of who i really am. getting swept up in the doing good things is far easier than i like to admit. i'm finding it's not enough to just be a good person and do good things. even tho God has made me passionate about loving people....it's just that i can get so focused on that....that i forget to slow down and just be who He tells me i am. to just revel in the presence of a Holy God.
last night i was reading The Shack by William P. Young...anyway, it's not my favorite, i mean there are definitely some things that i don't particularly like about it, but this section i read last night really struck a chord in my heart. it goes like this, the main character, Mack is having a discussion with God and the He says,
"The real underlying flaw in your life, Mackenzie, is that you do not think that I am good. If you knew I was good and that everything - the means, the ends, and all the processes of individual lives - is all covered by my goodness, then while you might not always understand what I am doing, you would trust me........trust is the fruit of a relationship in which you are loved. Because you do not know that I love you, you cannot trust me." Then Mack says, he doesn't know how to change that, and the Sprit answers,
"....For now I just want you to be with me and discover our relationship is not about performance or you having to please me. I'm not a bully, not some self-centered demanding little deity insisting on my own way. I am good and I desire what is best for you. You cannot find that through guilt or condemnation or coercion, only through a relationship of love. And I do love you."
I think I underlined and commented in the tabs and everything all over that section ; ) I just feel like those are crucial fundamental facts we have to grasp about the nature of God...and it's so easy to stray from that. Even if we're focused on other good and beautiful things. It's hard for it all to really count for me if I'm not sure of who the Lord is and in effect, who I am. Anyway, those are my thoughts for the day : )
As far as what I'm doing....well, we're training the new spring staff here in L.A....I'm kind of being trained along with them a bit. However, if you haven't already heard, I have taken the Associate Director position with CSM-Houston! So I'm moving to H-town March 1st and will start then full time. There are obviously a lot of other details, which I will spare you at the moment. You can definitely be remembering me and CSM Houston in your prayers though. Today we found some temporary housing for me though! So that's really exciting....hopefully I'll be staying for as long as I need to with a family while I transition. Praise the Lord for that! Also though, you can be praying for a decent car for me. I'm working with a ministry right now trying to work something out, but just for all those details to come together : ) Anyway, that's that. I'll update again as soon as I get a chance! Much love : )
3 comments:
I love reading your blogs. I love your writing. And I love to see the way the Lord is working in your life and you are loving life in Him. I do, however, love The Shack too. And it IS one of my favorites right now andover the last year. What is it that you don't like about it? Don't want to debate you just wondering.
thanks :)
and i think it makes me uncomfortable that Papa is a woman...and i guess i believe that God has a little more control or ummm sovereignty than the book gives him credit for. and that's about it :) i actually still haven't finished it because i took a break to read the final Harry Potter book....haha
Let me know if you still think the book still takes sovereignty away from God after you have finished it. I think it gives Him complete Sovereignty! And are you more comfortable with God as a talking lion? :)
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